It doesn't matter where you're born,
it doesn't matter where you come from,
it matters where your head is at.
--Gene Simmons

Disclaimer: This story features Superman, which is a trademark of DC Comics, and the cast of the Tenchi Muyo! OAV series, which is a trademark of AIC/Pioneer LDC, Inc. This is an unauthorized work, and no profit is being made off this work by me. This story is copyright of me. Download if you like, but please don't archive it without my permission. Don't be shy.

Continuity Note: Sometime after OAV #13 (Here Comes Jurai), Ryoko got busted by the Galactic Tribunal. Following the events of ACTION COMICS #773, Superman attempted to get her out, but wound up getting thrown into the same cell for being found in contempt of court. We join our story, already in progress...

"The Earth looks so beautiful from up here. This really is a magical moment, isn't it?"

"Indeed. But the view would be meaningless without you here to share it, Ayeka..."

"Hey, now, you two'll have plenty of time to admire the scenery on your honeymoon, right? Let's just get right down to the matter at hand shall we?"

Tenchi nodded and straightened his cummerbund. "Of course. We're ready when you are, captain."

"Yes, please proceed with the ceremony," Ayeka echoed.

"All righty then. Princess Ayeka of the Planet Jurai, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do."

"Tenchi Masaki, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do."

"Then by the power vested in me as captain of the Ryo-Oh-Ki, I now pronounce you husband and wife! Huzzah!" Ryoko cheered, holding up a camera. "Kiss the bride, make the check out to 'Ryoko' with one 'k', and that's all she wrote!"

On the bridge of Ryo-Oh-Ki, the two newlyweds shared a passionate kiss while Ryoko snapped a picture, then started tossing rice in the air. "Not to cast a pall over this moment," she mused, "but something seems... I dunno, 'off' about all this, as if--"

She awoke with a scream. "GAAAAAAAHHHHH!" to be precise. Ryoko sat up in one quick motion, her eyes wide open from the shock of what she'd just witnessed. "What the fuh--What was that?!" she panted, trying to calm down. "Must have been something I ate to cause that kind of a nightmare--"

And about then she realized where she was. The cold dank air, the stench of about fifty or sixty different alien life forms who had once inhabited the room before her, the hard concrete surface she'd been sleeping on, the hum of a force field that sealed the place off, and the confining restraints that held her arms behind her back. And of course, there was the empty metal tray a couple of feet to her left.

"Right. Prison food. Always makes me have bad dreams," she mumbled.

She lay back down on the floor and considered just how she'd gotten into this mess. For openers, she was born. That was probably where it all went downhill. Created from a hybrid of genetic material from an alien DNA sample and the mad scientist Washuu, Ryoko was almost immediately taken into the service of the arch-villain Kagato, and used as his personal weapon of mass destruction. Four thousand, three hundred years later, she met her match, when a Jurai prince called Yosho defeated her and trapped her in a cave on the Planet Earth. He then had a grandson on the Earth named Tenchi, whom he later manipulated into freeing her from the cave after seven centuries as part of his plan to lure Kagato out of hiding so his grandson could discover his true potential and defeat him once and for all. Not the end, but for the most part she seemed to have been living happily ever after anyway.

The problem was that her past had a way of catching up to her. Following Kagato's defeat, Ryoko was reunited with the mother she never knew she had. And she had made a few enemies in her lifetime, like Dr. Clay... and that new guy, Superman. She didn't see a great deal of resemblance between herself and Washuu, but apparently her acquaintances could barely tell them apart, and hijinks ensued.

Not that she hadn't made plenty of her own enemies in five thousand years. The bounty hunter Nagi, who'd made it her life's work to bring Ryoko to justice--she'd returned with a vengeance, subcontracting some big dope named Lobo to finish what she'd begun centuries ago. After a night in an alien prison, on some far flung planet she'd never even HEARD OF before yesterday, it looked as if Nagi had accomplished what she'd set out to do.

And Tenchi? Well, she'd burned that bridge all too well. She'd picked a fight with one of his Juraian relations. Ayeka had been her main rival for Tenchi's affections, and they often came to blows over that point of contention. But this time he strayed to close to the action, he got hit by mistake and fell off a wall. Alive? Sure. Well? Certainly. Tenchi was made of sturdy stuff.

But she knew there was no reason for him to go looking for her now. She'd proven what everyone had known about her from the start: She was a maniac. A creature of mass destruction. A loose cannon. Those doubts and fears were what let Nagi beat her so easily, and they still rankled within her now. Wherever she was, and whatever these people had in store for her, it wouldn't be enough to make up for the pain she'd caused.

"For what it's worth, Tenchi," she said quietly to herself, "it was fun while it lasted."

"Talkin' to yourself, are we?"

She jerked upright once again at the sound of this new voice. It wasn't the guard who usually checked up on her. This was someone new. And he was opening the force field gate to her cell. "Well, you'll have someone to keep you company tonight at least," he mumbled. "Rumor's goin' round that you've got some folks tryin' to help you out, Ryoko. Serve 'em right if you killed 'em all in their sleep, I say."

Visitors? Cellmates? She didn't understand what kind of prison could have such top notch security and allow something like this, but she knew it could only be one person... "Tenchi?" she asked hopefully.

The first figure walked into the light and she saw a massive frame, a little over six feet tall, and dressed in a now-familiar red and blue costume, highlighted with a pentagonal shield design on the chest. Ryoko rolled her eyes and tried to ignore the taste of bile building up in her throat. "Oh. It's you," she said coldly.

"Nice to finally meet you under less hectic circumstances, Ryoko," Superman said dispassionately. "Pleasure's all mine."

She looked up to the guard as he took his seat on a bunk. "Can we just get on with the execution now?" she asked. "Fun's fun, but rooming me with this dope is just being cruel."

The guard didn't respond, except to lead more prisoners into the cell. A small blue-haired child with optimistic pink eyes, a tall blonde lady in a police uniform, and a small four-legged animal, who leaped into her arms despite the pair of energy shackles restraining her front paws. The guard reactivated the field and walked off.

"I brought a few friends," Superman said with a smirk. "I think you know Sasami, Detective Kuramitsu, and Ryo-Oh-Ki."

He was a complete moron, she decided. Of course she knew them. Ryo-Oh-Ki was her spaceship, for crying out loud. She was her oldest and closest companion--a trusty pet who could transform into a reliable transport. She cradled her between her legs and listened to her telepathic questions and reassurances, and she tried her best not to let her own dismal mood worry the creature. And of course Sasami and Mihoshi were just two of the aliens she'd lived with on the Earth. She looked at their smiling faces and frowned. "We've met," she finally said to Superman. "The question is, what are they doing here? This is my mess, Cowboy. One you helped make, I might point out."

"Superman wanted to help you, Ryoko," Sasami said innocently. "We came along because we thought you might need us. Are you OK?"

She bit her lip and shut her eyes tightly. "I really wish you hadn't gotten involved in this, kid," Ryoko sighed. "You're out of your league. And if Mr. Wonderful was so interested in my well-being, he would have stopped Nagi from finishing me off in the first place, instead of dragging you guys here into who knows what!"

"Ryoko, please!" Mihoshi scolded. "Superman came a long way to see you. You shouldn't blame him for this."

"Besides," Superman added, "you were the one who created that demon when you knew you couldn't control it. I didn't want to abandon you in the middle of a fight, but I couldn't just let that thing run amok on Earth. And if I had, it would have headed straight for your home. At least my way, Sasami and Mihoshi agreed to take the risk."

"Yeah, well that's freaking incredible, guy," Ryoko growled. "Let's bring everybody out to watch Ryoko screw up once again. Sasami and Mihoshi can watch me blow Tenchi straight to hell, you can lead bounty hunters right to me with your thick head, and after I nearly kill everybody trying to defend myself, we can all head down to the jail to watch me get my head cut off! If the plan was to make me feel worse than I already do, then mission accomplished."

"Ryoko!" Sasami exclaimed. "I know you feel bad about all this, but Tenchi's fine! He just got a little bump on the head. He'll be all right, I promise. He's not even mad at you."

"He's not--?" She looked up at her and felt her eyes moisten slightly, then looked back down again and shook her head. "That's not the POINT! I screwed up, and he got hurt for it. I wanted to crawl in the deepest darkest hole in the universe for that, and it looks like I got my wish. Just get the hell out of here before it gets any worse, OK?"

"We can't," Mihoshi said wearily. "Thanks to Superman, we're stuck here for the night. But at least we get to defend you before the Tribunal in the morning to convince them to release you."

"Release...? Don't you get it?!" Ryoko yelled. With considerable effort, she worked her way to her feet and stomped over to Mihoshi until they were nose to nose. "I'm a SPACE PIRATE, Mihoshi. Whatever they want me for, I'm guilty as charged. It's not a question of whether you LIKE me or not, or even if I'm a nice person. You think I'm wearing this harness because I'm good with children? What part of your bubble-headed brain doesn't get this?"

"But Kagato--" Mihoshi explained.

"--is DEAD," Ryoko interrupted. "I'm not gonna live my life pretending that every dumb thing I ever did was because the boogey man made me do it. Maybe that'd be enough for these Tribunal guys, but it doesn't wash with me. Let 'em finish me off. At this point I just don't care."

"Your friends told me a lot about you, Ryoko," Superman announced. "When I battled Washuu in Metropolis, she used a machine modeled after your form to defeat me. When I met Tenchi in Japan to stop Washuu, he told me how you tried to avenge his seeming death in battle. On the way over here, Mihoshi and Sasami told me about how brave and selfless you could be. I came to respect you by reputation, even if you did strike me as immature. But none of them mentioned anything about wallowing in self-pity. They never said anything about you being a quitter. So maybe we're in the wrong cell, because somehow the descriptions don't quite match up to the genuine article."

"T.S." Ryoko replied.

"That's right," Superman snarled. "Because I don't care how miserable you feel right now. I DON'T give up, and I WILL get you out of here, even if I have to break both your legs and carry you home myself."

"Sure, knock yourself out," Ryoko muttered.

"Then you can start by filling in some of the gaps. Tenchi told me Washuu created you, but he didn't mention that she was your biological mother. So where are you from, originally?"

"Tenchi's a sweet guy," Ryoko said glumly, "but he tends to gloss over the complicated stuff. Like Sasami here being his centuries old great aunt, but she looks like she's half his age. Or me being put together by a punk kid in some lab somewhere. He'd never show it, but it creeps him out. I can tell."

"Then it wasn't a conventional birth, I take it?" Superman asked.

"Beats me," Ryoko shrugged.

"You're not from any planet, are you?"

"Why don't you shove it, huh?" Ryoko scoffed.

"I'm just trying to determine your situation here," Superman said patiently. "The Tribunal believes in charging people with the crimes of their ancestors. That, and any crimes committed in their sphere of influence. If we can establish that your heritage falls outside those restrictions, then we can--"

"I don't HAVE a 'heritage', Cowboy. That kind of thing's for normal-borns, or planets with aristocracies like Sasami's." She nudged her shoulder in an effort to gesture towards herself. "One of a kind over here. Daddy was a test tube, get it?"

"In vitro..."

"What did you call me?" Ryoko growled.

"Its from an old Earth language meaning 'in glass'. It's a medical term for being born outside a mother's womb," Superman said. "It's how I was born. And I've been told I have MY mother's eyes, too."

Her glare softened slightly.

"Now, maybe you'd like to stop fighting me seeing as we've got a little common ground?" Superman suggested. He picked up the dinner tray and crushed it in his hands, twisting it into a pretzel shape. "Because the general consensus is that you're a lot better off when I'm fighting on YOUR side. And I didn't come all this way to lose my temper."

"So what's your interest in my well-being?" Ryoko demanded. "Don't tell me you're another one of Washuu's 'breakthroughs', because I don't have much use for her, or any 'brothers' she might have cooked up."

"I've dealt with these people before," Superman said. "And your friends tell me you're not the dangerous monster they want to convict. You need help. I can give it. What more motivation do you want?"

She stared at him in astonishment. Then turned away in what might have been shame. "I... What do you want to know?"

"I know Washuu used her own egg cells to create you," Superman said. "I picked that up when I saw your cell structure matched hers so closely. But there's more to it. Your cells bear an distinctly alien characteristic that I've never seen in any humanoid life-form. So what else did she use?"

She gave no response. Ryo-Oh-Ki meowed urgently to her.

"Ryoko, he wants to know about your father," Sasami offered helpfully.

"I think she'd rather not discuss it, Sasami," Superman said to her. "Maybe it would be easier if you explained it to me. And you can talk softly, so we won't offend her."

"Well..." Sasami whispered. She looked at Ryoko and then walked over to Superman to talk into his ear. "You see, Miss Washuu told us that Ryoko's father is called a Mass. They're strange looking animals that live somewhere far away--I don't know where. Even Miss Washuu doesn't know everything about them, but she told us that they're not very smart, and when they sense a strong will from something else, they all do what it wants. Oh, and Ryo-Oh-Ki was made from them, too, but Washuu used some different lifeform to do it."

"I see," Superman said quietly. "But that actually works out well for us. If Ryoko is descended from non-sentient lifeforms, then it's entirely possible the Tribunal won't even consider her responsible for her actions. It would be like sentencing a coyote to the electric chair. And that would also explain--"

"Hey, I just thought of something, you guys!" Mihoshi shouted out. "If we tell the judge that Ryoko's honorable father is a Mass, and if we tell them that they're easily influenced by more intelligent beings, then we could say that its not her fault because she's just really prone to being manipulated! Isn't that great?!"

"When they execute me, I'm gonna haunt you for the rest of your life, Mihoshi," Ryoko barked.

"Hey, that'd be great! Then we could talk and... wait, you'd be a GHOST! Oh, geeez I don't wanna be haunted!" Mihoshi began to sob uncontrollably.

"Look, first of all it won't come to that, I promise," Superman said assuringly. "Second of all, there's no reason for you to be so sensitive about the matter, Ryoko. We all come from somewhere, and its not something to be ashamed of if you were born a little different from most everyone else."

"I'm not ashamed of anything," Ryoko spat. "It's just... embarrassing! I used to get along just fine without all this personal history being constantly thrown in my face. I don't see why it's so important now."

"It's important because you're important," Superman said. "Understanding your past helps you understand yourself better in the here and now. I find it a little hard to accept that you never got the least bit curious about who you were and where you came from."

"How would you know anything about it?" Ryoko asked.

"Um, I was hoping maybe you'd tell us that, too, Superman," Sasami said meekly. "What planet are you from?"

"Oh, I know about that!" Mihoshi broke in with enthusiasm. "According to the thoroughly researched comics I've read from Mr. Misaki's collection, Superman comes from a planet called Krypton! It's a beautiful place with giant cities made of crystal, and there's a volcano made of gold, and..."

Superman held out his hands to silence her. "Mihoshi, please! I already told you that a lot of the material used in those books is created by the writers. I let them use my likeness and did a few interviews to help them come up with the stories, but most of it is pure imagination. I mean, I couldn't tell them EVERYTHING, after all. And as long as the profits go to charity I don't care what they write about me." He sat down on a cot and took a deep breath.

"No, the truth is that while I do come from a planet called Krypton, that world no longer exists today..."

You see, hundreds of centuries ago, long before any of you were born--maybe before even Washuu--Krypton was a lush and beautiful world. It's people were advanced in the ways of science, and they enjoyed their world with a vigor and passion much like the people of the Earth.

In time, however, that passion for their culture, and that dedication to the pursuit of knowledge would one day sow the seeds of their own destruction. For two hundred thousand years ago, the people of Krypton grew fearful of alien races and the effect they would have on their own kind. To that end, an ancestor of mine, Kem-L, developed a device that would isolate Krypton and its people for all time: The Eradicator. Its purpose was to alter the biochemical makeup of Krypton's environment and inhabitants in order to bind Kryptonians to their planet. From that day on, any Kryptonian who tried to leave the planet would die--quite horribly at that--after only a short time away from his home world. Additionally, the Eradicator possessed tremendous destructive power, enough to kill any alien being who attempted to visit Krypton.

But that alone didn't seal Krypton's fate. Among their other scientific wonders, Kryptonians had learned the secrets of genetic cloning. At it's height, their techniques were so sophisticated that the life expectancy at that time was nearly indefinite. Every man, woman, and child on the world was assigned three clones, kept in stasis until the original person became injured or aged, then servitor robots would remove healthy organs from the clones and graft them into the original body. As you can imagine, this was met with great controversy, as many believed it was immoral to create potentially sentient life forms purely for the sake of spare parts. The bitterness between the opposing sides of the issue soon led to a terrible war, lasting a thousand years until one side attempted to detonate a weapon that would destroy the whole planet--a mad effort to avenge the butchered clones who had died before the war. Another of my descendants, Van-L, was able to prevent the bomb from destroying Krypton, but before he did, the weapon had poured untold nuclear energy into the core of the planet.

This was the beginning of the end, and by this stage Kryptonian society had become too cold and sterile to understand it. My people had found new ways to extend their lives, and in the reconstruction from the war, they had become distant, eventually to the point where each Kryptonian lived alone, never experiencing physical contact with another. I suppose I can't blame them, since centuries of passion had led to such destruction, it must have seemed the only way to preserve the peace. Still, the legacy of Krypton's hates and fears wouldn't be denied, as one man, my father Jor-El, would discover.

Jor-El was something of a revolutionary on Krypton. Unlike his fellow men, he refused to blindly follow tradition. When he was selected by the government to be permitted to bear a son to take the place of a recently deceased citizen, he actually fell in love with the woman whose DNA would be artificially combined with his. He studied Krypton's ancient history fervently, as if he lived out their fiery struggles in person. And when Kryptonians began to die of a mysterious plague, only his unconventional thinking allowed him to uncover the truth.

"A chain reaction within out planet's core has caused vast pressures to build..." he told the science council, "fusing our native elements into a new radioactive metal that surrounds... and dooms us all!"

The council, however, would hear nothing of it. "A deadly new element--? Absurd! Not a cloud traverses the sky, but that we control its progress. Not a flower blooms that we do not oversee."

"But what of the quakes that have begun to rock our cities?" he demanded. "You must listen to me! If we are to survive, we must leave Krypton!"

But the council refused to hear him out. After centuries of unquestioned control over their world, it was simply unthinkable that Krypton could actually behave in such a way to destroy them. "As you know, Jor-El, we have been bound to this world by our ancestors. We could not leave... even if we wanted to!

"No! You're wrong!" he objected. "I have found a way to alter that genetic proscription. Let me show you--"

"What you suggest is an abomination! We will hear no more!"

And with that, Jor-El returned to his home with the bitter taste of failure on his lips. There was no more time. No chance of saving Krypton or its people. There was only one thing left for him to do. With what little time he had left, Jor-El searched for a world that could sustain Kryptonian life, and then he ordered his robot servants to bring him the gestation matrix, in which his unborn son was being grown from the genetic combination of his parents. This soon caught the attention of his mother...

"Why have you removed our son from the gestation chambers?" Lara demanded. "You endanger him by bringing him here!"

"The danger is already here, Lara," he explained. "Beneath us... surrounding us. I cannot save our world, but I WILL save our son!"

Lara's concern was understandable. She had known Jor-El to be an upstart, but when she learned that he had taken their child--something unthinkable in that society--she risked visiting him in person to confront him--to find out why. There, he told her the truth, that the "plague of green death" on Krypton was no disease at all. "There is no plague," he told her, "except the one we've brought upon ourselves. I don't need permission for what I plan to do. I simply... thought you would want to know."

She bit her lip as the realization sank in. With everything she had ever known on the brink of oblivion, there was only one thing she could ask. "How... how will you save our child?"

Jor-El activated a holographic projection from his records. "Across the reaches of space, I have found a word much like the Krypton of millennia past." He showed her an image of a simple earth farmer, brandishing a pitchfork as he labored in the sun.

She was horrified. "Oh! Brutes! Savages! Breathing unprocessed air! Baring their flesh! You would send our son to that hell?"

"Not a hell," Jor-El replied. "For him at least, more of a heaven! Exposed to Earth's yellow sun, his cells will become living solar batteries. He will grow ever more powerful. Until, in time, beneath the rays of that sun, he will be a superman among men."

And with that, the final quakes began that would eventually tear the planet asunder, and he activated the hyperdrive unit that would carry the birthing matrix far away to the distant planet Earth. From there on, Earth would be the new home for their son--the last son Krypton would ever have.

He finished his tale with a deep, lingering sigh. Ryoko looked at the others and found them on the verge of tears.

"It just... it just exploded?" Sasami asked. "And you're the only one left?"

"I've investigated occasional leads that might have led to finding other survivors," Superman said. "But all dead ends. I'm the only one left."

"That's so--so AWFUL," Mihoshi sobbed. "I mean, if my homeworld was destroyed, I'd... I don't know WHAT I'd do."

It was an interesting reaction, Ryoko noted. To them, the idea of losing their entire people was unthinkable. She'd never had any to begin with, so in a sick sort of way, she'd almost anticipated the conclusion to his story. "You tell it as if you had the whole thing memorized," she finally said.

"In a way, I do," Superman admitted. "After all, I was barely an infant when Krypton exploded, so I grew up on Earth with no knowledge of what had happened. It wasn't until I was seventeen that I learned the truth, when a computer program in the rocket ship downloaded information about Krypton directly into my mind. That, and it's often the first question people want to ask me, so I've gotten used to telling the story. I can't blame them, since I used to wonder the same thing as a kid."

"Lemme get this straight," Ryoko asked. "So you just walk around in broad daylight with a big sandwich board that reads 'Kiss me! I'm an alien!' and you just tell any human who asks all about your background?"

He shrugged. "The life of a public figure," Superman replied. "I know other extraterrestrials who prefer to work in secret, but I find that being open and honest with people makes my job easier. Earth can be a very hospitable place, but I'm sure you've all come to realize that."

"Yeah, but I wasn't talking about the public reception," Ryoko contended. "I was thinking about the repercussions of just blabbing your life story to anyone with a curious look in his eye. Hmmph. You remind me of the last time I told anyone all about myself."

"You mean us, Ryoko?" Mihoshi asked.

"Nope. You guys found out about me the same way everyone else does: hearsay," Ryoko explained. "Oh, Tenchi might have learned something from his grandfather, and Sasami learned about me attacking her planet, and Mihoshi had her police reports, and when you compare notes you put it together pretty well. Of course, Washuu filled in the rest pretty well... Point is I never told you anything. Because the last time I told people about myself, it got those people dead."

"I'm not sure I understand," Superman said. "Professor Washuu made you. How is that dangerous information?"

Ryoko shuffled herself to the nearest wall and leaned back against her genti-lock restraint. "Because when you're paranoid, any information is considered vital..."

After all, today we know that Washuu used her own egg cells to create me, but it was Kagato who realized he could use that opportunity to seize control of Washuu's inventions. I wouldn't have any idea how, because as far back as I remember, Kagato always claimed that he created me, and Ryo-Oh-Ki, and the Souja. And he used all three of those "creations"--along with whatever else he must have taken--to further his primary goal: power.

Of course, power comes in many forms, and it converts from one to another depending on how it's used. Even Kagato needed cash, or various items stolen for his research. That was where I came in. I did his dirty work when he needed it. That made me a pirate.

"You've done quite well, on your last few assignments, Ryoko," he told me once with a twisted grin on his face. "You're becoming quite the pirate these days, aren't you?"

"What's a pirate?" I asked him. I must have been maybe a hundred years old at the time.

"A pirate is someone who steals things," he explained. "Treasure, money, technology. Or someone who utilizes copyrighted work without permission from the author. Come to think of it, that'd make us both pirates, wouldn't it?"

"It's your show," I told him.

That was his mistake, you see. Because I never questioned the fact that he'd whisper his thoughts and orders into my head and I'd just do whatever he asked. I had no frame of reference. It seemed perfectly natural to let someone else do the heavy thinking, and there was no reason to believe otherwise. But once he created a label for me--pirate--it gave me the idea that I was part of a larger community. I wanted to learn more about the job, at first just so I'd be doing Kagato's dirty work more to his liking, and later on, I only wanted to learn about it because he wouldn't let me. Resistance. Just a little.

Eventually, it got so strained that he didn't maintain total control over me all the time. He'd have me do a few jobs and then cast me away until he needed me again. So I went into business for myself. Just to see what I could see. That got me involved in the annual Galactic Pirate convention, held each year on Cygnus XII. Cyg-Con, we called it. The scum of the universe would show up for those gatherings, and in time I learned to envy them all. That was when I learned what a pirate was.

They held a bake-off that year. I'm no cook, not even close to Sasami's level. But come on, it's pirates, right? Nobody knew how to boil water on Cygnus XII. But everybody had to spend long nights alone in space, eating whatever they had at hand until they could find a restaurant or something. This way we all had a chance to make fun at each other's cooking. So, by some twist of fate... or whatever, I won. Some of the guys took me to this little steakhouse out of the way to celebrate. It might have been the first time that anyone ever did something FOR me, without expecting something in return. I can't remember. Anyway, we got to talking, and somebody proposed a toast.

"Arrrr, mateys! The sake here's as watery as the piss of the Almighty, but it'll do us some good to wash down the putrid taste of R'oko's cookery!"

"Aye! Aye! Arrr!" we all shouted in laughter. The whole thing was great. For once I felt like I was with my own kind. Then somebody asked me.

"Son of a goat's entrails, Ryoko! Ye may have gotten yer good looks from yer mother, but it's clear she didn't teach ye a blessed thing about the culinary arts, eh?"

"Go to blazes, Grozy!" I shot back. "You know pirates like us don't have mothers! I was kicking butt and conquering the galaxy while all my enemies were still nursing in someone else's arms!"

The room fell silent at that. "Arrr?" I added, hoping that would somehow fix it.

"By Darkseid's jockstrap!" one man finally blurted out. "Ryoko, are ye sayin' that yer not born of a woman like the lot of us were?"

"Ah, no?" I said carefully. "Was... I supposed to be?"

"Hell damn yes!" another shouted back. "But ye never did follow the same rules as the rest of us, ya bloody demon! No wonder you're the most ruthless, reckless, and soulless out of all of us space-scum here!" This got a big laugh from the crowd, and the same guy offered up the toast. "To R'oko! Heaven won't have 'er, Hell's too tame for 'er, so the devil spit 'er up on this universe so the motherless succubus could poison us all with 'er cookin'!"

And that seemed to smooth it over. I wasn't like them, but they accepted it. They were even kind of interested in it, once the liquor took hold. "So, lemme get this straight," someone asked me during the night. "You just grew up somewhere... all alone. How'd you even get started in the pirate business? Ever'body I ever knew got into it cause they wanted to run away from somethin'. Break away from their old life. You was like that to start with?"

"Well, I got into it stealing things for Kagato," I said.

"An' who the krunk is that?"

"Duh! My master, you star barnacle. You know, I bet he'd know if I had a mother..."

"Master?" the man spat up his drink... maybe threw up the last two he'd had. It was a long time ago, so I'm not sure. "You ain't no space pirate! This line of work, you don't TAKE guff from other guys. You GIVE it. Yer no pirate. Hell, you ain't even a mercenary."

And for the next few hours I started learning just how different I was from the rest of them. Pirates were supposed to be free spirits. Riding the universe for fortune and a good fight to pass the time. Me, I'd been doing lackey work for some jerk who was too big a weenie to do it himself. And the more we talked, the more I told them about my life, and who I was, and what Kagato was like. And then it happened.

+There you are. It's beginning to become more trouble than it's worth looking for you, you know. One might think you're deliberately trying to hide from me, Ryoko. But that's not terribly likely, since you know fully well that you can't.+

"Go 'way," I told him out loud. "I'm busy."

"Who the sprock is she talkin' to?" one of the pirates asked. "Is that that Kagato jackoff talkin' to her telepathically?"

"Yeah, tell him where he can shove it, R'oko! Motherless demon like you doesn't need some dandy givin' her marchng orders!"

I heard him sigh in my mind. +...You told them, didn't you?+

"Maybe." See, Kagato was pretty spineless. Always was. Powerful as he was, the idea that a bunch of drunks on a remote watering hole knew anything about him or his operation--it scared the crap out of him. I knew him well enough to know what he'd say next.

+Well, you might as well kill them all and be done with it. There's work to be done, and I've wasted enough time tracking you down as it is.+

"Do it yourself, ya pansy," I said out loud. I still wonder if it was the booze talking or a sense of outrage that he'd been sheltering me all those years so I wouldn't ask too many questions.

+I think you've reversed the nature of our relationship, Ryoko,+ he sneered. +Kill them. Now.+

"Make me."

+That was the general idea, yes.+

And that was the end of the discussion. I stood up, stiffened, eyes glazed over, and I felt my lips curl into a vicious smile. It's an old, familiar feeling, almost like drifting off to sleep. And the next thing I knew, I was standing in a pool of blood. Every single person who I had opened up to and shared a piece of myself that I had never shared with anyone... they were all dead. And I killed them. And I didn't really mind all that much. Because Kagato wouldn't let me.

After I cleaned up and got back to the Souja I asked him pointblank. "Do I have a mother?"

"Irrelevant. I just forced you to kill every living thing in that bar."

"So?"

"If someone were your mother, do you think she would still want to be after what I've made you become?"

"You're a real loser, you know that, right?"

He smiled. "And what does that make you, I wonder?"

Her reminiscing was cut off suddenly by what sounded like a muffled thunderclap. With a start, she jerked her head in the direction of the noise and found it in the palm of Superman's hand. "What are you DOING?" she asked in astonishment.

"I-I'm sorry," he said, shaking his palm for a moment and then massaging the knuckles of his other hand. "It's just that I became Superman so I could stop things like that from happening. So I could put down bullies like Kagato before they can start. Hearing things like that--it reminds me that no matter how much I can do, it'll never be enough."

"Pfft! This was like a thousand years before you were born, Cowboy," Ryoko snapped. "What's done is done. Kagato's gone for good, so I wouldn't cramp your head worrying about it."

"That's good to hear," Superman said. "I imagine reasserting self-control must have been tough for you."

She smiled wickedly. "Oh, no trouble at all, really. It's easy, as long as you get someone to bury you alive for a few hundred years. I guess I finally found a place Kagato wouldn't have thought to look."

"What was it like?" Superman asked.

Ryoko laughed bitterly. "What do you THINK it was like? Hmmph. I must have spent the first twenty years screaming until my lungs were raw. After that, I started crying. Later on... I just sort of lay there. I guess I figured that if I was dead to the universe I might as well go along with it. My astral form started to wander around the outside of the cave. I could see the outside world like it was a dream, but that was it. I watched the people as they passed by. Learned how to speak Japanese after a while. And I watched this little boy grow up, until one day he..."

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Why am I telling you all of this?" Ryoko asked in a frustrated tone. "I don't even KNOW you."

"Maybe I'm just the first person to ask the right questions," Superman offered. "Let's just say I know a thing or two about conducting an interview."

She chuckled wearily. "Nah, I blame the robot."

"Robot? This has to do with your mother, doesn't it?" Superman asked.

"You're smarter than you look," Ryoko replied.

I'm not clear on the details, of course. That wasn't my end of the operation. The key issue was that I was stuck in a vat of some kind of goo, and directly to my left was another me stuck in a another vat of goo. The other me was dying, and looked up at me with painful eyes.

That was why I agreed to it, I suppose. Doc Clay abducted me, and sent his robot goon Zero to disguise itself as me in order to infiltrate Tenchi's house and nab Washuu. I forget why, exactly, but Clay had a beef with Washuu, and I think you can understand that well enough, right? Anyway, the flaw in Clay's plan was that his machine had duplicated me too well, and it became overwhelmed with the template of my own emotions. And when the others went looking for me, Zero--still wearing my form--turned on her creator to prevent him from endangering Tenchi.

Clay was appalled that Zero could defy him, so he hit some kill switch to destroy her. We beat Clay, and Mihoshi took him downtown or wherever it is she takes creeps like him, and we were left with Zero's dying body. In her INFINITE wisdom... Washuu figured the best thing to do would be to assimilate Zero with the genuine article, preserving her life and granting her her fondest wish: Being me.

Yeah, that was my reaction at the time, too. Washuu has a way of saying mind-blowing crap like that the way most people announce that they're going to go outside to put some letters in the mail. Credit where it's due, though, she did leave the decision up to me. It was MY identity she wanted to alter, so it was only fair.

And I looked at Zero dying in Tenchi's arms, and he still hadn't quite wrapped his brain around the fact that it wasn't the REAL Ryoko (like I said, he's a sweet one, but he tends to gloss over the complicated stuff), and she looked up at me as if to say she was sorry she intruded on my life.

And something inside of me realized that those were my eyes, and that was the look on my face once upon a time... at least I'd assume so. All the pain and suffering I'd seen in my lifetime and here was someone who envied ME for being so fortunate. And she was reaching out to me for her last hope, just like I must have done a few thousand years back. I couldn't refuse after that. I didn't even know what would happen to me, but I couldn't just turn my back on her after all she'd been put through.

So Washuu pushed a button on some of Clay's equipment, and the vats of goo started to swirl and churn.

"So far this ain't so bad," I said, kind of relaxed that this would be quick and clean.

"I haven't started yet," Washuu replied, and then she hit the other button. All in all, I liked that first button better.

The whole world seemed to unravel in my head. I felt like I was being torn apart and reassembled, and I guess I really was on some level. It was like when Kagato used to make me do things, I felt like I'd lost control, like I'd handed it all over to someone else and left the hard part to them. And I heard another voice in my mind.

+I'm sorry it has to hurt this much.+

+Don't... sweat it,+ I thought back. +You wanted to be me, right? Well, that means you gotta learn to be tough. It'll all be over soon...+

+Thank you. You/we didn't have to do this.+

+Sure we did. Trust yourself, Ryoko. You helped save Tenchi, and now you're gonna help each other. I'm in good hands, and so am I.+

+Our/my mother is very proficient, yes. Although pretty annoying personally... I am not sure I am used to the idea of being someone's daughter.+

+Join the club, Ryoko.+

+Indeed, but there is only one Ryoko...+

And the next thing I knew I was slowly hauling myself out of the vat. I leaped down from the opening and miraculously landed on both feet. I stumbled, and Washuu took my hand to keep me from falling on my butt.

"And how are we feeling, hmmmmmmm?" she asked.

I just started laughing without hesitation. "Heh-heh-heh... that was hilarious... Hahahahaaaaaaaaa!"

"The procedure?" Washuu asked.

"No... no, the a-heh-heh-heh! The time I told Ayeka that Ryo-Oh-Ki was the love child of me and Tenchi... and she was BUYING it--HAHAHAHAHAH!"

"That would have been months ago," Washuu observed. "It must have been a heckuva prank."

"It was funny before," I snickered, tears streaming down my face. "But now it's HILARIOUS! Hee hee hee heeeee! Oh, GAWD... what did you do to me?"

"I speculated that Zero's emotional immaturity would alter your own ability to express your feelings," Washuu reminded me, "but I must admit, this wasn't quite what I had imagined. It'll take further study..."

"No... no, no, I think I got it. Yeah. Yeah, I can control it sort of. It just takes--a-hee!--takes some getting used to. We did it, y'know. We saved the Love-Bot that dared to walk like a woman! You and me, mom!"

"This won't last, will it?" she asked.

"Not a chance in hell," I said, regaining a little sobriety. "You played Zero like a fiddle while she was bein' me. I might have to do something about that..."

"Hmph. Well regardless, I'm still proud of you. Now let's get off this ship and go home, huh?"

"Home..." I said softly. It was like a fresh new word all of a sudden. "Yeah..."

"Incredible," Superman gasped. "I've experienced telepathic unifications in the past. Always temporary, and usually only involving a combination of surface consciousnesses. But to be combined with a separate mind, even such a close approximation of your own... I don't know what to say. It seems to me, though, that anyone capable of demonstrating that kind of compassion deserves a second chance from the Tribunal."

"I wouldn't make too much out of it," Ryoko said, rolling her eyes. "You're easily impressed, you know that? It was a minor inconvenience for me, and by now I'm pretty much back to normal except for a short span of my memory where I recall two separate sequences of events."

"And you're too jaded," Superman replied. "You saved a life, Ryoko. There's nothing casual about that, particularly when it involved the risks you took to do it."

"Don't say that," Ryoko hissed. "Don't sit there and tell me about how precious life is. And don't even try to build me up with one favor I did for a lousy robot when I just told you how I killed a room full of people I called friends without even so much as a second thought." She turned to look at Sasami and Mihoshi sleeping on the other side of the cell. "Look at them. They have no idea what kind of misery and suffering I've inflicted in my lifetime. But it's touched them all. Look at the kid and tell me what a great, swell guy I am, Superman."

"She wouldn't have even come with us if she hadn't been so worried about you that she stowed away," Superman said.

"You don't even know, do you?" Ryoko laughed bitterly. "How could you? I barely understand it myself! When I invaded Jurai seven hundred years ago, she was on the planet. I don't know how or when, but in the attack, she lost her balance, fell, and broke her neck. Dead. One more tally for the space pirate."

"I don't understand," Superman said. "If you killed her, then how--?"

"On Jurai, all the spaceships are grown like trees," Ryoko explained. "They ARE trees, I suppose. And the MOTHER of all the trees in the Jurai fleet is named Tsunami. In fact, that was what Kagato sent me to Jurai to get, because he figured Tsunami was the key to unlimited power in the universe. Looking back, I don't know how I was supposed to pull any of that off for him, but Kagato never did read from the same book as everybody else. Tsunami discovered that Sasami was dying, and she somehow bonded herself to her, assimilating with her. Her injuries were healed, and she was back to life.

"The CATCH to that is that while Tsunami is flying around the galaxy somewhere now, and Sasami is a little girl sleeping in a prison cell, when she grows up, she'll be one with the Mother of Gonzo All-Powerful Starships. At least that was how it was explained to me. So even though Sasami isn't consciously aware of any of that, deep down inside she's got to look forward to a very uncertain future of flying around and blowing things up. Does that sound like anyone YOU know?"

"One or two people, sure," Superman answered with a grin. "So you feel bad that because of you, Sasami will be condemned to becoming something like yourself. A monster. A freak of nature. Like that?"

"I'm upset that I have to live side by side to my own victims," she shot back. "And worse, they seem to look up to me like I'm such a nice person. No regrets, because I wasn't responsible for what I did, but neither will Sasami when she blows up some OTHER kid a million years from now and SHE grows up to be some other world-shattering dreadnought. It's all so arbitrary and brutal... where does it end?"

"With you," Superman answered. "It's people like you who struggle to find a sense of purpose and meaning out of the aftermath of something like that. That's why Sasami looks up to you. She sees a being like you with all that power, but at the same time you have all the weaknesses and foibles that everyone else has. If on some level she does understand what she's becoming, then I'd imagine she's using your example to comprehend it. Maybe she doesn't know the whole story on you, Ryoko, but she knows the part that matters. Or she never would have come all this way to help you."

Ryoko shifted her eyes away from him and remained silent.

"For what's it's worth, I know what it is to take a life," Superman said solemnly. "And I know what it is to carry that burden inside of you."

The circumstances aren't important. Suffice to say that I traveled to another universe. A "pocket dimension" created by a mysterious enemy from the distant future. In that universe, only two planets had intelligent life: Earth, and Krypton.

Like my own Krypton, it exploded long ago, but there was more than one survivor from that disaster. Three criminals were banished to an interdimensional void called the Phantom Zone, and when an Earthman used a Kryptonian device to open a gateway into the Zone, they escaped and came to the Earth. The yellow sun gave them great power, even greater than my own, and they used it for the sole purpose of subjugating the human race. Even though this Earth had no heroes to defend it, the humans battles valiantly against the unstoppable conquerors, and when the criminals grew bored toying with the people of Earth, they sought to eradicate them utterly.

Before they finished their grisly deeds, one desperate man discovered a way to summon help from THIS universe, and so I came to learn of their terrible plight. By that point, the Kryptonian criminals had wreaked untold ecological damage on the Earth, rendering all but a few underground bunkers habitable for human beings. Alongside the handful of surviving humans, we battled them with everything we had... but it just wasn't enough. I'm not sure I would have made it back myself, but before the last human was killed he told me where I might find a sample of a substance that would defeat them. I used one sample that removed their powers, reducing them to the strength of the humans they'd killed. And then I was left to figure out what to do next.

With everyone on the planet dead, I was the only representative of justice left in that world. And here I had three despicable beings who killed a billion people with no remorse or compassion. Even after I stripped them of their powers they laughed at me, and swore that they would find a way to get their power back and attack my own Earth one day. After all they'd done they had no regret or pity, and were only interested in finding new worlds to destroy.

I couldn't leave them there. Thanks to their own twisted designs the Earth was an airless wasteland, and other than the makeshift shelter I had kept them in there was no way they could have survived for long on their own. Bringing them back with me would have accomplished nothing, as no legal authority on my universe would be able to pass sentence on a crime committed beyond reality itself. And so that left me as the only one who could administer justice on that dead world. And I did the only thing I could do.

I killed them all.

I tried to tell myself that it was the only way, and even now I truly believe that it was the only way, but I couldn't bear the guilt of having to do something like that. After I returned home, the psychological anguish took its toll, and I began to lose control of my powers and myself, something that would have been dangerous to everyone if I had stayed on Earth. So once again I did the only thing I could.

I left.

For a while I just wandered the far reaches of space, trying to figure out what to do with myself, battling alien menaces as they presented themselves, and doing my best to forget what I'd left behind on my adopted world. But, like you, Ryoko, I couldn't escape my past. In time I met a man called the Cleric, who had once visited ancient Krypton thousands of years ago. He told me about my world, and when I told him about the shame and guilt I carried in my soul, he told me that no matter what I'd done or what had happened, that I was Krypton's last son, and that I had an obligation to make my life a testament to everything that was great about my people. I owed it to them, and more, I owed it to myself to return to my home and start again. I can still remember what he told me. He said that if life was a precious gift, then I had to embrace it, instead of trying to escape from it.

"I've tried to live up to the faith he placed in me ever since," Superman said. "The Cleric, my friends, my family. Even when the Tribunal tried me for my ancestors' role in Krypton's destruction, they finally sentenced me to a lifetime of carrying on my struggle for justice. It hasn't always been easy, but when the hard times come, I always think about all the people counting on me to fight on. It doesn't take away the pain of past mistakes... but it reminds me that I can't become so consumed with it that I stop trying."

"So what are you saying?" Ryoko asked. "You want to plea bargain the Tribunal so they'll sentence me to jumping buildings and saving babies like you?"

"It beats dying alone on a strange planet, right?" Superman replied. "But no, I'd rather not have you strong-armed into doing something you're not ready to commit to. As far as legal maneuvering, I just want to demonstrate to the judges that Ryoko the World-Ravager was never responsible for her actions, and now Ryoko the Person has taken her place. And that Person is someone the Tribunal had no business arresting to begin with."

"Sounds simple enough," Ryoko admitted. "So why did you come down here to see me?"

He smiled warmly at her. "I just told you, Ryoko. I've been where you are now. Where you are inside here," he said, pointing his fist to his heart. "Just because there might be a legal justification doesn't change the emotional turmoil you're holding within. I flew off into space with a small canister of air and no real concern over how long it would last. You've exiled yourself in your own mind, curling up in a cold cell all alone and waiting for the authorities to do the honors. Not a death-wish, really. But just the same, you wouldn't object much if you suddenly found yourself in mortal danger. Correct me if I'm wrong."

"Keep talking," she grunted.

"And I came here to make sure your spirit was still in this. It doesn't do me any good to fight for your life if you've already given up before we get a chance to start. So you made a mess of things back home. It happens to everyone. No hard feelings, I'm sure. And yes, you've been party to a lot of horrible things. But like I said, that's not who you are now. You're the only one of your kind. Your friends look up to you, and they love you. You have a family... they'll want to see you again. You owe it to them to pull yourself up and start again where you left off. You owe it to Zero. It was her dream to live your life, right? So why end the ride here? You owe it to those pirates from the steakhouse. They were interested in your life story. Make the rest of it something worth dying to find out about. And your mother..."

"Correction," Ryoko broke in. "Washuu's not part of the equation one way or another. You may as well ask me to think about the dead Mass remains in her autoclave. She's as much my mother at that was my 'father'. Same difference."

"I thought you said she was proud of you when you assimilated with Zero," Superman challenged.

"Well... she was just being facetious," Ryoko stammered.

"If you believed that," Superman said, raising his eyebrow skeptically, "then I don't think you would have mentioned that detail. But for the sake of argument, let's say she just considers you another invention."

"OK."

"When Washuu visited my hometown, she used genetic tinkering, radioactive chemicals, and highly sophisticated computer programming techniques, all for the sake of getting under my skin. So far--and I'm not exaggerating here--of all the scientific marvels at her command, you strike me as the only thing she actually did right."

She snickered with glee.

"I mean it," he said. "I mean, Ryo-Oh-Ki is nice, too, but I had to fly halfway around the Earth to buy her love with carrots. And you're a lot more sociable in prison than she was walking freely in Metropolis."

Ryoko smiled wickedly and made a mockingly innocent face. "Attention, students!" she said in a shrill, sarcastic voice. "Please direct your attention to this informative multimedia documentary on just how great and wonderful I am!"

"Ha-HAA! That's her!" Superman laughed.

"Huh... well now that you mention it, the old bat probably would start to get cocky without me around to remind her that her feet touch the floor," Ryoko mused.

"I could sure use someone to keep an eye on her in case she ever sets her sights on Metropolis again," Superman offered. "Seems to me you'd have been doing that anyway, right? So what do you say?"

Ryoko turned to look at Mihoshi and Sasami sleeping on the floor. They must have been exhausted after coming all this way after her, she realized. She looked back at Superman, still patiently awaiting her answer. Just looking at him seemed reassuring somehow, as if even complete strangers were willing to take a chance on someone like her. He was weird like that... sort of the way Tenchi used to look at her when they were just getting to know each other. And she looked at Ryo-Oh-Ki, sitting quietly in the corner, smiling at her with those deep yellow eyes. She was her oldest friend, and she didn't need a telepathic rapport with her to know her feelings at the moment. And so she looked back at Superman and nodded vigorously.

"What the hell, after all?" she said. "I'm not sure I buy everything you're saying... and I'm not sure I really am the Ryoko you think I am. But I gotta admit, I wouldn't mind getting to know that Ryoko better when this is all said and done. You got yourself a deal, Cowboy."

"Glad to have you aboard," Superman said.

NEXT: TRIAL AND ERROR